Ron Weasley the Big Shock about Harriett Porter
by TheGoldenGryff
Summary: It doesnt really go anywhere - harry changes into girl due to wrong spell. What happens? FIND OUT!


Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters, except for Harriett  
Porter (the name) and other original names and characters, including  
'Professor H. Murkinstral'. This is set in what I think to be the 6th book.  
Ok, this isn't what I think will happen, it's a rough guess.  
Ron Weasley and the Big shock about Harriett Porter  
Well, from the title, Harry Potter has reversed himself to make a mean boy  
for the quidditch match, but sadly it all goes wrong. He turns into a girl,  
and 'she' goes into the Gryffindor tower and is mistaken for a newcomer.  
Ron and Hermione in 6th year, Harriett tells them that Harry has been taken  
back by the dursleys and harmed, and it's no point in calling him because  
they'd just hurt you.  
Harry (who is Harriett from now on) tried to reverse himself to make a  
toughie boy for Quidditch for the next Thursday. But, instead, he made  
himself a girl, with all the same thoughts, feelings, and such as himself.  
This is the story.  
Harriett walked slowly down the corridor, getting every inch of her body  
looked at. She was frightened, frightened of going into any shower or  
bathroom, or the bedrooms, and taking off her clothes. She didn't know what  
was under there.  
"Okay, Harry Potter, Stay calm, it's alright being a girl. Think of all the  
secrets you'll uncover!" whispered Harriett's shoulder angel in her mind.  
"Oh yeah, but what about BOYS?" screamed the shoulder devil in her  
thoughts, "They'll come up to you, want to kiss you, and when they do, what  
if you change back into Harry Potter, the not-a-girl who lived?!"  
Harriett regretted listening to this devil and carried on walking.  
Suddenly, she collided with a blonde haired boy while she was daydreaming.  
Her books scattered all over the floor, while she fell over and 'cut' her  
forehead.  
"AH! Sorry about that...erm..." hurried Draco, and he looked at her scar. "That  
looks like Harry Potter's! Are you related to him?"  
"Err...no..." She mumbled. She picked up all her books and began to run.  
After 5 minutes or so of clear running, she collided with the Gryffindor  
tower Fat Lady.  
"Well, well, a newbie, huh? Have you forgotten the password, little one?"  
The fat lady was overprotective, but very fun sometimes.  
"Yes, I have. What was it a-oh, yes, I'm sorry, I forgot you couldn't give  
people the password!" squealed Harriett.  
"Oh, let's forget that rule and keep this a secret between you and me, ok?  
It's Flyttusnun," whispered the fat Lady. Her real name was actually Lilac  
Moonrise, her name was given as she was always lit up happy by newcomers,  
and most newcomers were called new moons, or Lilacs (because of the lilac  
robe badges they had saying 'New'.)  
"Flyttusnun," screeched Harriett, and the portrait swung open. Inside were  
Hermione and Ron.  
"Who are you? And where is Harry?" squeaked Hermione. Her eyes were bright  
and bloodshot, with a kind of creepy, blank look in the depth of her eye.  
"Erm...I have no idea...umm..." muttered Harriett. Hermione got up and started  
to yell.  
"What have you done with him?!" Screamed Hermione. "Have you any idea I've  
been worried?! I have always stood there for Him, helped him, and now I  
regret following Ron back to the common room! CAN YOU TELL ME? HMM?"  
Suddenly, without warning, Harriett started to cry. She cried and cried and  
ran up the stairs. Ron looked furious with Hermione, eyes narrowed, ears  
going red – always a danger sign – and yelled at her.  
"There was no reason for that!" moaned Ron, "She was new! How on earth do  
you feel that you have the heart of gold in this group!" he stormed off and  
wasn't seen again.  
That morning, Ron came down with a dreamy look on his face. As soon as  
Harriett came down, Ron gave her a smile, and then sneaked a small, reddish  
purple flower into her pocket. The three walked sensibly to the potions  
dungeons: 'three' as in Hermione and Ron got along again, and Hermione was  
treating Harriett nicely. When they got there, they sat down and Professor  
Snape got up.  
"Welcome to another ac – hmm," he droned, "Longbottom isn't here. Welcome  
to another class of potions. Get out your books, please, and start writing  
down the ingredients. '2 parts asphodel, 1 part water, 5 Moline (pronounced  
MOW – lane) eyes, 3 drops of Dolphin's juice, and 2 jars of powdered  
Unicorn's horn.' Got it? Now, put them in the order needed for the  
Synuleneà juice to be made." As it happened, Hermione was shocked by a  
certain Slytherin named Draco who had added an extra Moline to her mixture  
in which when they tried it on their pets, her cat turned into a half-  
human, half-cat instead of a full human.  
"Draco, you little - !" yelled Ron, and before Hermione could say 'No!'  
Ron had already leaped at Draco and punched him right in the eye socket. He  
lay there, faking weakness when his real sub-conscious was saying 'Get up  
and fight the guy, he just punched you in the eye!!!!!!! You can't see!'  
After potions (when they had lost 20 points from Gryffindor because of  
Ron) they walked all the way to The 'Holiday' board. It was a type of  
holiday board where if you were feeling down in the dumps you could, if you  
wanted, have a virtual holiday! When they had gotten into the room, Ron  
poked 'Egypt' and suddenly vanished. Hermione poked 'Muggle City' and  
disappeared, too. It came for Harriett to poke a place. She searched the  
board, not wanting to poke the Muggle city island. She went to poke 'Spain'  
but gave up and poked Egypt instead.  
BANG  
It was a warm day at Egypt. The Pyramids were so pointy that when Harriett  
climbed up one, she nearly poked herself off the pyramid! Ron heard her  
screams and ran to help.  
"What on - ?" he yelled. "WHAT'S WRONG?"  
"ARGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!" screamed Harriett unduly. Before anyone could  
do anything (Ron was really quick) he had built a large pillow of sand.  
Harriett fell from 20 feet and had a large cut down her arm and a scar on  
her leg. Ron now screamed. He tapped the little Hogwarts Island on the  
pyramid, dragging Harriett, and ran through the corridors and up flights of  
stairs. Ron burst into the hospital wing showing the unconscious Harriett.  
"You've gotta help!!!!!!!!!" he moaned at Madame Pomfrey.  
"Wha-what? Oh, my – thank you! Thank heavens this girl was rushed quickly  
to me! Lucky she's still alive!" She gawped.  
After sending Harriett to the hospital wing, Hermione caught Ron (after  
being warned and coming from the Muggle city) and asked what happened.  
"Well, it was like...erm, I don't know, I only caught the bit where she  
fell. I didn't watch it all!" explained Ron. Hermione ran to Harriett, and  
saw the cut and scar, when she stared buggy-eyed at her forehead.  
"Ron, this is a relation of Harry, I'm sure of it, there's a scar on her  
forehead, look!"  
"Well that's a twist..."  
"We must contact Harry, say his sister or someone is hurt!"  
Here, Harriett managed a whisper.  
"Don't contact Harry, my brother is in danger with...the...ow...dursleys," She  
said.  
They both stared. She was saying what Harry had been dreading...well, Harry  
(underneath all this girly junk) wanted them to think that.  
Once Harriett was out the hospital wing, it was time for DADA. Their  
teacher, Professor H. Murkinstral, was the meanest of the bunch of DADA  
teachers. She had (yes, a SHE) pale, yellowy-green skin, with blotchy,  
brown nails. Her teeth were whiter than ever, though. She used Moline's  
blood to brush her teeth. Her raw red hands scratched along the wooden  
desk.  
"Today," she screeched, "We will begin on Magical Forces. Open up to page  
967 of 'Forces and their powers'."  
Everyone turned the pages, Harriett getting confused and going to page 697,  
and then realising that was what they had done 3 years before.  
"Everyone got their pages? Oh, Neville, it is page 967, not page 796!  
There. Lavender, Could you come up here and hand out the worksheets? Good.  
Now, we shall begin on..."  
Hours passed, and silent hand chatter went on underneath the tables, using  
hand gestures. Harriett gestured to Hermione and Ron that this was not a  
lesson; it was a lecture on dressing your wands in fashion. Snippets  
included 'Your wand is your look' and 'Dress sense is in order for fighting  
the Dark Arts'. When Hermione sniggered a little, and Ron burst out into  
peals of laughter, Murky turned (murky was their nickname for Murkinstral)  
to face whoever the culprits were. She only heard Ron but suspected others  
too.  
"WHO IS LAUGHING? THIS IS A SERIOUS LESSON!" Professor Murkinstral yelled  
out loud. Hermione stopped but Ron didn't. She was furious. "Ronald  
Weasley. Step up to the front of the class NOW." He stepped up and groaned.  
"50 points off Gryffindor!" He sat back down and the droning went on until  
the end off class.  
"Homework: The worksheets! Need to be back in by Friday!"  
Back at the tower, Hermione said the password and found out a few new  
things ("You told Harriett the password?!") and went inside. It seemed a  
secret meeting had been going on between Fred and George – but that  
couldn't be right, Fred and George had left school to start the Joke shop...  
"Heya, Little brother!" George said with a smile.  
"We came back, only for your entertainment." Bowing, Fred looked up at Ron  
and then let his big Cheesy grin deflate with seeing Harriett. "Who's  
this?"  
Ron and Hermione explained everything, what her name was to the tiniest  
detail (even including Harriett's joke collection). They all laughed when  
hearing what had happened to Draco one evening.  
"...and then, you'll never believe this, Draco gets up, grabs his 'book' and  
opens it, copies out the 'information', and then guess what, he gets his  
homework wrong for the FIRST TIME in the history of Malfoys getting their  
homework right or wrong..." Fred was literally rolling on the floor,  
laughing, but Hermione had lost her interest in what had happened, having  
found it boring news, and sat doing her homework. Ron clapped out the story  
and sat down, tears rolling down his face. TTT (the two twins) bowed and  
left for their dormitory. Hermione left for hers, and Harriett and Ron were  
left downstairs alone. Ron, having had a crush on Harriett from the start,  
looked around, and spoke to her.  
"Well, erm...nice night, isn't it?" He asked. Harriett had forgotten about  
being a boy really, and was convinced to be a girl.  
"Yes. A beautiful night, if you think about it."  
"Erm...it's nearly Christmas, and there's mistletoe...above us..." Ron murmured  
'mistletoe'. He was sweating uncomfortably, not knowing the answer.  
Harriett nodded.  
"Yes. Mistletoe. Since we're under it, you know what happens."  
Ron got out 'Ye-' but was cut off; Harriett had pulled him in and were  
kissing in an instant. Emerging surprised, he gasped for breath, and both  
got up, and walked into their dormitories, amazed at what they had done.  
Next day, the quidditch match was on. Harriett, getting into the stalls,  
could hear what was being said in the changing rooms.  
"Now, Harry isn't here as seeker, so we have chosen Colin Creevey, the  
person Harry told all about Quidditch – alright there, Colin?"  
"What if Colin can't see the snitch?" Fred's voice was familiar, the two  
other beaters were long gone from the match.  
"Someone else will point out the snitch. Now, brooms ready –"  
The players zoomed out onto the pitch and it started to lightly snow. It  
was Christmas Eve and everyone felt Christmassy. Gryffindor won and there  
was a big celebration. One celebration game was Blackout. People took swigs  
(Lol – Swig!) of alcohol and the lights went out. People had to pick up  
clues off the floor, and the person with the clues won. Ron had bumped into  
Harriett while she was finding her way through back to her dormitory. He  
thought she was a clue and while he was moving along Harriett followed the  
deeply dark shadow. She lay down on her bed but Ron lay on top. The night  
carried on lonely.  
The next morning everyone was so blissful. Harriett got a few presents, a  
jumper and some mince pies (Mrs Weasley was informed of Harriett's  
existence) and a rotten fruit basket joke for her collection from TTT. She  
felt slightly irritated, but thought no much of it.  
A few weeks forward, she was being sick regular in the mornings. She  
suspected period: there were pains in her stomach. But surely you never got  
kicking feelings...? She decided to visit Madame Pomfrey. She should know  
what to do.  
As she walked down the corridor, she suddenly noticed in a window how fat  
she was getting. 'Best lay off the cakes,' she thought suddenly. Arriving  
at the hospital wing, she told Madame Pomfrey about her pains. A Disease-o-  
wand was popped in her mouth and it turned red. This indicated something  
different. Madame Pomfrey checked the chart and said the bad news.....  
"You're pregnant," she murmured to Harriett. She caught the drift and  
started to scream.  
"I can't be pregnant! I can't be! I can't be! I AM NOT PREGNANT! I CAN'T  
BE!!!!!!!!!!!!" Madame Pomfrey stared and just told her to get some  
painkillers for the night-time. So, after getting painkillers, she asked  
who the father of her 'Beloved' baby was.  
"Let me check, we have a colour for each pupil here. We made new colours,  
it's quite fun. Mmmmmmmmmmm...Oh, it's turned Pink with purple polka dots and  
green stripes. That would be Ronald Weasley." Harriett was nearly sick.  
"Her" best friend was actually the father of "Her" baby. It felt sickening  
that Harry inside could actually have a baby. 9 months of knowing that  
information...and still knowing it after it was born. (Oh, man, I just can't  
wait...Harry's gonna give birth in this chapter OK? I like to get things done  
with. Sorry for those of you ready to wait and willing to go through  
suspense!)  
9 months later, during a cold night, Harriett had a contraction. She  
gasped, and turned over in her bed. A few minutes later, there was another  
and she sat bolt upright, breathing heavy. She checked the book that Madame  
Pomfrey gave her during her pregnancy about contractions. "If you are NOT  
giving birth, they should be longer than 5 minutes apart." She had studied  
the time when she got the first contraction. It was 0:24 then. Now it was  
0:26. She suddenly got another. 0:27 and she knew what was happening. A  
gush of water cascaded down her legs. Seeing as she told Ron all about it  
(and to some good results *he didn't mind*), she started to yell. Not his  
name though, Ron knew Harriett's voice from a crowd.  
"HELLLLP!!!! HELLLLP!!!!" she cried. Almost everyone woke up but Ron woke  
up first. Her voice echoed into his dormitory. Catching the drift, he ran  
out and wildly stared around for the Girl's dormitory. He ran inside and  
immediately saw her. He called for Prof. McGonagall and she ran upstairs  
and inside. Everyone was awake by now. They were either hiding under the  
covers (feeling ill or scared) or they were crowded around Harriett  
watching what was happening. McGonagall called Dumbledore and the moment he  
came in and saw what was happening he called for a hospital. She could  
either have it magical born or natural. She asked for a natural, it  
wouldn't be as fun for the Fan fiction if it was magical. (A/N: Sorry!) So  
off they went to the hospital, dragging friends along. Hermione was in the  
ambulance back, praying that Harriett would not die of childbirth. Ron was  
closest to her and was kissing her forehead and hand.  
"Harriett, are you ok? Do you need a drink?" he kept asking, and every  
time Ron asked if she wanted a drink, she shook her head.  
After everything was done, Harriett was sitting in the hospital bed,  
cradling a little baby girl. She was quite lonely except for the tiny  
bundle in her arms. Ron came in and asked if she was OK. Harriett nodded  
her head and looked at the baby. She wanted to name her Karriett but that  
wasn't a name. Deciding on the name Kazie, they escaped the hospital back  
into Hogwarts. Harriett sat in the common room, cradling Kazie. She was  
just a tiny baby, her arms flailing about. The high-pitched squeal of the  
baby almost instantly broke the silence. Harriett had forgotten all about  
the fact she was a boy underneath it all. Kazie's large, blue eyes and her  
ruby lips just made Harriett melt. She fell asleep with Kazie in her arms,  
and lay peaceful.  
Harriett was in a garden, with waterfalls and lush green trees. Kazie was  
nowhere to be seen, and only a bunch of boys down the far end were shown.  
Tiptoeing slowly down to the nearest willow tree, she noticed the boys were  
laughing manically. They were torturing something. She ran into the middle  
and it was a figure of a little girl, and then, turning, she saw millions  
of children either injured or in the making of being wounded. Suddenly, she  
woke up.  
Kazie was nowhere, and Harriett was lying on the floor sobbing. But it  
wasn't Harriett anymore. It was Harry. Harry got up, and wondered why he  
was back. A few minutes ago he was a she, but now he was back – and he was  
a mother. He shuddered and went to locate Kazie. On the discovery of her,  
he picked her up and pretended he didn't know why there was a little baby  
on the floor. But he gave up on pretending. He went off to tell Ron.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~:*:~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
(11 years later)  
Ron had still not gotten over the shock that he had had a child with a BOY  
– especially a friend. But the fact that Harry had forgotten he was a boy  
while as a girl was OK. Draco still came to call Harry a 'Big girl's  
Blouse' but that didn't matter. Now Kazie was going off to school and was  
going to tell everyone about the weird way she was born.  
"Better be........................................................................................" There was a long pause for  
Kazie's chosen house: "Better be...........Mmmmmmmmmmm...what house, definitely  
what house...HUFFLEPUFF!"  
There was cheering from the Hufflepuff table and Kazie ran to the selected  
table. She automatically sent a letter to Harry and Ron saying which house  
she was in.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~:*:~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Ron collected the owl and read the letter. He smiled.  
"Hufflepuff. It's close enough."  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~:*:~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Harry read the letter and laughed.  
"Hufflepuff's gotta be as good as Gryffindor."  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~:*:~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
A/N: TADA! It's finished! Oh, BTW – how do you allow anonymous reviews? 


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